54 Quotes & Sayings By Kathy Bryson

​Kathy Bryson is a national speaker and author. She is a former newspaper reporter and columnist whose work has been published in several magazines, including "Reader's Digest." She is the creator of the "Return to the Happy Place" website and the founder of The Happy Place Foundation. In 2003, she launched a national speaking career to share her message of happiness with others. In 2005, she founded Be Happy, Inc., a program dedicated to helping people find their "Happy Place" through positive thinking and practical techniques.

1
I heard ‘naked’ and ‘full of hot air.’ I try not to let that be my first impression of anyone. Kathy Bryson
2
I am always a perfect gentleman. If you ever want me to not be a perfect gentlemen, you’ll have to ask and not be crying when you do. Kathy Bryson
3
You are never to drive like that, ” I told them. “Even if you are ever wealthy enough to own a Jaguar. Kathy Bryson
4
How would we get corporate sponsorship if we were just a bunch of thugs? Kathy Bryson
5
I love the man, ” Megan said as she took a seat, “but honestly he needs to learn when not to agree with me. Kathy Bryson
6
That’s the problem! She doesn’t say anything. She just stares at me like she’s hypnotized, like she thinks I’m a god, but then she runs off squeaking if I try to talk to her.”“ I don’t squeak, ” I protested. “Maybe she’s not looking at you like you’re a god. Maybe she thinks you’re more of a freak, ” Fergus mused.“ I’m not a freak.” Murphy jerked his head as if dodging a fly or tossing his hair. “It’s definitely a ‘you’re a god’ look. She practically drools. Kathy Bryson
7
I’m an ass, ” the voice on the phone said. “A complete and total ass. Kathy Bryson
8
It was a sign of how worried and confused I was that I wasn’t completely distracted by the sight of his powerful thighs flexed in front of me. Kathy Bryson
9
Leprechauns are not twee beings dreamed up by the tourist board, but warriors of legend. That name comes from the Celtic god of commerce and war, Lugh. Their mission, their life’s work, is to protect the gold. What better way to hide it than to become a joke, a story nobody takes seriously? Kathy Bryson
10
Jinx, I know you just lost your grandfather, but you straighten out your tone right now or I will smack you one! Kathy Bryson
11
Ah, that’s just sean nós singing and dancing. Something to do around the pub of an evening. Kathy Bryson
12
Don’t know what I’m talking about? Don’t know what I’m talking about! ” My shout hit notes that normally only Wagnerian sopranos can reach. “You think you’re a freaking leprechaun, but I don’t know what I’m talking about? Kathy Bryson
13
No, really, ” she said. “We get it. Sometimes the guy just makes you crazy, even if you do love him. Kathy Bryson
14
You could have agreed to disagree, ” Megan argued. “Then you could kiss and make up. That could be fun. Kathy Bryson
15
A country road, a gravel road, is a sign of civilization, sure, but it’s just a farm, an easy conquest. Iron means a stronghold, people who can defend what’s theirs. Kathy Bryson
16
You can’t have it both ways. Either I’m Irish and can talk, or I’m a man and I can’t. Kathy Bryson
17
Mr. Jennings is the one who trapped the fairies here to begin with. If they’re back and wandering around, if they’re loose, then, well, it’s not good. Kathy Bryson
18
That’s not Eire. Everyone always thinks that, but we’re not shamrocks and wee men. You should know the difference. Kathy Bryson
19
Murphy didn’t appear to notice my chagrin, but instead pulled up the hem of his long-sleeved tee to wipe at his face. Since he flashed his sculpted abdominals right at me, I grew hot and flushed. I mean, you could see every dip and curve, including the ones on either hip that made a V to lead the eye to the fly of his jeans. Kathy Bryson
20
Everyone helping out was supposed to make me feel better, but it actually made me feel more like a screw up. Kathy Bryson
21
The older lady smiled a friendly welcome that rivaled her preserves for sweet appeal. She could have been someone’s grandmother complete with close-cropped white hair if she wasn’t wearing a worn Grateful Dead T-shirt over a long-sleeved thermal. The 1987 Summer Tour. Kathy Bryson
22
Now, where had I heard drinking and brawling before? Oh right, Ashley’s father. Well, I wasn’t doing that again. Kathy Bryson
23
That was one tiny trailer when both girls wanted to watch TV or use the computer or the bathroom at the same time. Kathy Bryson
24
It was easy to imagine he’d just rolled out of bed and then it was easy to imagine him in bed and I wasn’t going there. Kathy Bryson
25
Ours was not one of those nice, quaintly old-fashioned mobile homes that senior citizens putter around in. We lived in the beat-up tin can of clichéd poverty. Kathy Bryson
26
Take some advice from an old farmer. You’re in business now. Take the money. You’d be amazed at how many don’t want to pay. Kathy Bryson
27
I realized that I sat in an empty bar in filthy, wet clothes with a drippy nose, probably red-rimmed eyes, and the most I could say I’d accomplished was that I was now congested. Oh, and one of the handsomest, nicest men I’d ever met cradled my face in warm, caressing hands with soft, sympathy in his brown eyes. Kathy Bryson
28
My inner bitch could handle this peon without even breaking a sweat. Kathy Bryson
29
Everything you’re telling me was just a story, and now it’s real. Kathy Bryson
30
A leprechaun did not just kill off my car in a hailstorm. Kathy Bryson
31
Grabbing someone’s ass doesn’t count as capturing them! Kathy Bryson
32
Oh, you’re hardly one to talk. Look where ogling a man got you. Kathy Bryson
33
You didn’t make her sue you, even if you did punch her at that wedding. Kathy Bryson
34
Are you trying to seduce me or trick me? Kathy Bryson
35
No one ever said you can’t have world dominance and a little romance too. Kathy Bryson
36
It was never just about the money. Kathy Bryson
37
Don’t pinch that guy’s ass. He’s a leprechaun. Kathy Bryson
38
She caught you. Therefore she gets your treasure. Kathy Bryson
39
There’s no way to stand up gracefully when your pants are down around your ankles. Kathy Bryson
40
You tell me the dead are coming through a crack in my barn, but I shouldn’t worry? Kathy Bryson
41
I missed the good old days when phones were sturdy enough to be pounded for emphasis. Kathy Bryson
42
This was going to be worse than the time I table danced in the diner in high school! Kathy Bryson
43
Banks frown when employees torch the home of their principal account holder. Kathy Bryson
44
I knew I would lose my job when I accidentally set fire to my best friend’s house. Kathy Bryson
45
This house has enough nooks and crannies for English muffins. Kathy Bryson
46
Turns out there’s a reason smoking is not allowed on construction sites. Kathy Bryson
47
You pretty much have to take the job since you hit him with the car. Kathy Bryson
48
Maybe you’re worried that I won’t seduce you? Kathy Bryson
49
Elvis is the soul of discretion. Kathy Bryson
50
Elvis is in the kitchen and he’s making eggs Benedict! Kathy Bryson
51
I’ve worked with freshmen that were easier than this. Kathy Bryson
52
I am not going to ask that old man if his family home is haunted! Kathy Bryson
53
He thinks you were trapped in a tree in the 1920s. How is that not crazy? Kathy Bryson