1
Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.Mark Twain
2
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d druther not.Mark Twain
3
What a hell of a heaven it will be when they get all these hypocrites assembled there!Mark Twain
4
I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one.Mark Twain
5
Who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it?Mark Twain
6
A hypocritical businessman, whose fortune had been the misfortune of many others, told Mark Twain piously, “Before I die I intend to make a pilgrimage to the Holy Land. I want to climb to the top of Mount Sinai and read the Ten Commandments aloud.” “I have a better idea, ” suggested Twain. “Why don’t you stay right at home in Boston and keep them?Mark Twain