1
Mortimer had maxed three credit cards stocking the cave with canned goods and medical supplies and tools and everything a man needed to live through the end of the world. There were more than a thousand books along shelves in the driest part of the cave. There used to be several boxes of pornography until Mortimer realized that he'd spent nearly ten days in a row sitting in the cave masturbating. He burned the dirty magazines to keep from doing some terrible whacking injury to himself. .Victor Gischler
2
She was like some kind of Energizer Bunny nonstop bitch machine... She needed three more husbands, so we could all take shifts listening to her.Victor Gischler