200+ Best Humour Quotes And Sayings

Life is full of ups and downs, and it’s important to know how to laugh through the tough times. Laughter is a sign of joy and happiness, but sometimes we find ourselves in situations that aren’t so funny. So why not learn from the funny people who have lived and shared their humor with us? read the best humour quotes below to lift your spirits and make you laugh.

If someone were to harm my family or a friend...
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If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them. Johnny Depp
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Sometimes you know you've got a chance with a girl because she wants to fight with you. If the world wasn't so messed up, it wouldn't be like that. If the world was normal, a girl being nice to you would be a good sign, but in the real world, it isn't. Nick Hornby
Smirking, he says,
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Smirking, he says, "Whatever spell you just tried to cast on me, it didn't work, so I think you need to go back to Hogwarts. Jenny Han
Do not take life too seriously. You will never get...
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Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. Elbert Hubbard
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I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable. Woody Allen
We are stuck with technology when what we really want...
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We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works. Douglas Adams
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There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says, "Boy, the food at this place is really terrible." The other one says, "Yeah, I know; and such small portions." Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly. Woody Allen
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People soon get tired of things that aren't boring, but not of what is boring. Haruki Murakami
I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel.
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I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel. Terry Pratchett
Darling, when things go wrong in life, you lift your...
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Darling, when things go wrong in life, you lift your chin, put on a ravishing smile, mix yourself a little cocktail... Sophie Kinsella
I've learned one thing: you can only really get to...
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I've learned one thing: you can only really get to know a person after a row. Only then can you judge their true character! Anne Frank
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Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Heres Tom with the Weather. Bill Hicks
I don't deserve a soul, yet I still have one....
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I don't deserve a soul, yet I still have one. I know because it hurts. Douglas Coupland
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Do you know what I think about crying? I think some people have to learn to do it. But once you learn, once you know how to really cry, there's nothing quite like it. I feel sorry for those who don't know the trick. It's like whistling or singing. Anne Rice
Never say no to now
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Never say no to now Benny Bellamacina
When the road ahead seems impossible, start the engine
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When the road ahead seems impossible, start the engine Benny Bellamacina
If you think fate is fickle, try tempting it
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If you think fate is fickle, try tempting it S. Spencer Baker
The church has never been asked to explain anything, our...
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The church has never been asked to explain anything, our speciality, along with ballistics, has always been the neutralisation of the overly curious mind through faith. Unknown
You can't always be right, but you can be wrong...
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You can't always be right, but you can be wrong a lot less Benny Bellamacina
LORD ILLINGWORTH: The soul is born old but grows young....
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LORD ILLINGWORTH: The soul is born old but grows young. That is the comedy of life. M R S ALLONBY: And the body is born young and grows old. That is life's tragedy. Oscar Wilde