Quotes From "Shes Come Undone" By Wally Lamb

People had always amazed him, he began. But they amazed him more since the sickness. For as long as the two of them had been together, he said, Gary’s mother had accepted him as her son’s lover, had given them her blessing. Then, at the funeral, she’d barely acknowledged him. Later, when she drove to the house to retrieve some personal things, she’d hunted through her son’s drawers with plastic bags twist-tied around her wrists. “… And yet, ” he whispered, “The janitor at school--remember him? Mr. Feeney? --he’d openly disapproved of me for nineteen years. One of the nastiest people I knew. Then when the news about me got out, after I resigned, he started showing up at the front door every Sunday with a coffee milkshake. In his church clothes, with his wife waiting out in the car. People have sent me hate mail, condoms, Xeroxed prayers…” What made him most anxious, he told me, was not the big questions--the mercilessness of fate, the possibility of heaven. He was too exhausted, he said, to wrestle with those. But he’d become impatient with the way people wasted their lives, squandered their chances like paychecks. I sat on the bed, massaging his temples, pretending that just the right rubbing might draw out the disease. In the mirror I watched us both-- Mr. Pucci, frail and wasted, a talking dead man. And myself with the surgical mask over my mouth, to protect him from me. “ The irony, ” he said, “… is that now that I’m this blind man, it’s clearer to me than it’s ever been before. What’s the line? ‘Was blind but now I see…’” He stopped and put his lips to the plastic straw. Juice went halfway up the shaft, then back down again. He motioned the drink away. “You accused me of being a saint a while back, pal, but you were wrong. Gary and I were no different. We fought…said terrible things to each other. Spent one whole weekend not speaking to each other because of a messed up phone message… That time we separated was my idea. I thought, well, I’m fifty years old and there might be someone else out there. People waste their happiness-- That’s what makes me sad. Everyone’s so scared to be happy.” “ I know what you mean, ” I said. His eyes opened wider. For a second he seemed to see me. “No you don’t, ” he said. “You mustn’t. He keeps wanting to give you his love, a gift out and out, and you dismiss it. Shrug it off because you’re afraid.” “ I’m not afraid. It’s more like…” I watched myself in the mirror above the sink. The mask was suddenly a gag. I listened. “ I’ll give you what I learned from all this, ” he said. “Accept what people offer. Drink their milkshakes. Take their love. Wally Lamb

Her shut-eyed smile transformed itself into something else: the smile of someone brave and knowing, someone whose pain had made her wise. Wally Lamb

Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself. Wally Lamb

That time we separated was my idea. I thought, well, I'm fifty years old and there might be someone else out there. People waste their happiness - that's what makes me sad. Everyone's so scared to be happy. Wally Lamb

Here is a girl who is pretty in a quiet way. I bet she's had a very sad life. Wally Lamb

You know what 'Dolores' means? It's Latin, means sadness. Our Lady of Sorrow. Why are you so sad? Wally Lamb

As my father talked, tears dripped down the side of his face like candle wax. The sight shocked me; until that moment, I had assumed men were as incapable of crying as they were of having babies. Wally Lamb

What if I don’t like adventure? Then cultivate a taste for it. Take a chance. That’s how you grow. Wally Lamb

You can be two things if you're a woman, Dolores. Betty Crocker or a floozy. Just remember your place - even if it kills you. Wally Lamb

I thought about how love was always the thing that did that - smashed into you, left you raw. The deeper you loved, the deeper it hurt. Wally Lamb

Getting a job scared her but she was determined not to shy away from risk. That’s what life’s all about. Climbing out onto the airplane wing and jumping off. Wally Lamb

Life's a shit sandwich, my ass. Life's a polka and don't you forget it! Wally Lamb

Jack Speight undid me, then I almost undid myself. But I've undone some of the bad, too, some of the damage. With help. With luck and love. Wally Lamb

When you deserved it, even the mail could rape you. Wally Lamb

Let me tell you something, my wife died for Tuesdays ago. Cancer of the colon. We were married forty-one years. Now you stop feeling sorry for yourself and lose some of that pork of yours. Pretty girl like you - you don't want to do this yourself. Wally Lamb