Quotes From "Chip Chip Chaw!" By Alex Bosworth

1
One day, back when I working at a video store, a woman accompanied by her two small sons walked up the counter with a tape box displaying a man slicing off someone’s head with a chainsaw. “Does this have any sex in it?” she asked. In my mind, it was like I was narrating a nature documentary on humans. “Watch as the American mother protects her young ones from dangerous influences. Alex Bosworth
2
Sure, I'd like a child of my own. I'd also like a laser pistol, that doesn't mean someone should give me one. Alex Bosworth
3
Whatever I haven’t accomplished biologically obviously wasn't all that imperative. Alex Bosworth
4
There are many ways to roll with the punches. Still, it’s probably best to avoid people who punch you. Alex Bosworth
5
Lately, I've become sort of a fatalist. Well, that was bound to happen. Alex Bosworth
6
My parents would not permit ugly language in the house, which was okay with me. I didn't want to learn German anyway. Alex Bosworth
7
Most people thought he was insane when he looked up into the sky with a simple handmade telescope and cried out that the Earth revolves around the Sun, because this was four years ago. Alex Bosworth
8
Have you ever suddenly realized it's someone else's mood swing and you're just along for the ride? Alex Bosworth
9
Every time I write about life, I must kill and eat the actual event. I mean to say that my words are scavengers who need to devour lifeless substance if they are to survive as non-fiction. The event is dead, it ceased to be as soon as it happened. The closest I can come to resurrecting the past is to feed my memories to a ravenous swarm of sentences, punctuation and paragraphs. They chew up and digest the things I remember, producing a waste product I think of as an honest account. Reality suffers a second death through this process. False memories, both organic and manufactured, erase the genuine article in order to reassemble the factors into a serviceable construct. True story. Alex Bosworth
10
Twenty years ago, chaos theory was all the rage. I wonder what happened with that. Maybe all the excitement over it become so organized that its initial entropy failed to fall apart and disintegrate into nothingness leaving its proponents re-illusioned in certainty. I remember seeing an employee at a local book store arranging a subsection for literature about chaos among the science books. "There’s the problem." I thought. "How can there be a chaos section? Those books should be distributed randomly throughout the store.. that is, if there was any real disorder to things. . Alex Bosworth
11
I had to break up with Medusa. I just got sick of buying mice for her hair. I should have ended it sooner, but you try looking into those eyes. Alex Bosworth