The process of miraculous change is twofold.  One:  I see my error or dysfunctional pattern.  Two: I ask God to take it from me.  The first principle without the second is impotent.  As they say in Alcoholics Anonymous, your best thinking got you here.  You're the problem but you're not the answer. The second principle isn't enough to change us either.  The Holy Spirit can't take from us what we will not release to him.  He won't work without our consent.  He cannot remove our character defects without our willingness,  because that would be violating our free will.  We chose those patterns, however mistakenly, and he will not force us to give them up.  In asking God to heal us, we're committing to the choice to be healed. . Marianne Williamson
About This Quote

This is a very powerful quote. When someone in a relationship is in a bad place, they try to change the other person in order to make them happy. This quote reminds us that if we want to be happy in a relationship, we need to be willing to change ourselves in order for the other person to accept us. It's not enough just to be there and then leave, we need to take responsibility for our own happiness. We cannot expect the other person to change for us if we're unwilling to do so ourselves.

Source: A Return To Love: Reflections On The Principles Of A Course In Miracles

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