What did I learn that day in the sabha? All this time I'd believed in my power over my husbands. I'd believed that because they loved me they would do anything for me. But now I saw that though they did love me–as much perhaps as any man can love–there were other things they loved more. Their notions of honor, of loyalty toward each other, of reputation were more important to them than my suffering. They would avenge me later, yes, but only when they felt the circumstances would bring them heroic fame. A woman doesn't think that way. I would have thrown myself forward to save them if it had been in my power that day. I wouldn't have cared what anyone thought. The choice they made in the moment of my need changed something in our relationship. I no longer depended on them so completely in the future. And when I took care to guard myself from hurt, it was as much from them as from our enemies . Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni
About This Quote

Gandhi said “What did I learn that day in the sabha? All this time I had believed in my power over my husbands. I had believed that because they loved me, they would do anything for me. But now I saw that though they did love me—as much perhaps as any man can love—there were other things they loved more. Their notions of honor, loyalty toward each other, reputation were more important to them than my suffering.

They would avenge me later, yes, but only when they felt the circumstances would bring them heroic fame. A woman doesn't think that way. I would have thrown myself forward to save them if it had been in my power that day.

I wouldn't have cared what anyone thought. The choice they made in the moment of my need changed something in our relationship." Gandhi was referring to when he was being brutally beaten by his own husband's brother Nathuram Godse in Feb 1948 when he was being heckled by members of his Congress Party for being too soft on India's partition by Muslim leaders after the First War of Independence in 1857. Gandhi refused to be intimidated and kept his cool during the attack and replied "What's this nonsense about throwing myself in front of the bullets?" But what he probably meant by this famous quote is that men are not always rational in their actions and can be influenced by their emotions to take irrational decisions.

Not all men are rational creatures and sometimes women are at risk when men are emotional beings who don't know how to control their emotions.

Source: The Palace Of Illusions

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