At first I did not love you, Jude; that I own. When I first knew you I merely wanted you to love me. I did not exactly flirt with you; but that inborn craving which undermines some women's morals almost more than unbridled passion--the craving to attract and captivate, regardless of the injury it may do the man--was in me; and when I found I had caught you, I was frightened. And then-- I don't know how it was-- I couldn't bear to let you go--possibly to Arabella again--and so I got to love you, Jude. But you see, however fondly it ended, it began in the selfish and cruel wish to make your heart ache for me without letting mine ache for you. Thomas Hardy
About This Quote

The quotation above is the last letter Jude wrote to his sister before he died. It was written in his own hand, with his own pen. The letter was found on the body of the man who shot him. The letter continues on, with Jude saying that he did not love her at first.

That he only wanted her to love him back. That he didn't even flirt with her because she was someone else's sister. He also says that he fell in love with her when he found out she was in love with another man…So it's possible that this "shot" was planned by someone who wanted to make the other man jealous enough to kill him.

Source: Jude The Obscure

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More Quotes By Thomas Hardy
  1. Love is a possible strength in an actual weakness.
  2. At first I did not love you, Jude; that I own. When I first knew you I merely wanted you to love me. I did not exactly flirt with you; but that inborn craving which undermines some women's morals almost more than unbridled passion--the craving...
  3. I know women are taught by other women that they must never admit the full truth to a man. But the highest form of affection is based on full sincerity on both sides. Not being men, these women don't know that in looking back on...
  4. Sometimes a woman's love of being loved gets the better of her conscience, and though she is agonized at the thought of treating a man cruelly, she encourages him to love her while she doesn't love him at all. Then, when she sees him suffering,...
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