118 Quotes & Sayings By Will Rogers

Will Rogers was a colorful and funny American comedian and voracious reader, known for his wit, humor, and love of words. He was an actor, a film producer, a newspaper columnist, a radio commentator, and a Republican politician. His ability to speak extemporaneously on any topic made him an ideal radio commentator for the Roosevelt administration during the Great Depression. He was on the payroll of the Works Progress Administration (WPA) during the early 1930s and was popular on radio with his commentaries on rural life and American history Read more

He also appeared in two movies: "The First Hundred Years" (1932) and "My Little Chickadee" (1940).

Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy...
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Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people that they don't like. Will Rogers
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Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to...
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Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. Will Rogers
I never met a man that I didn't like.
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I never met a man that I didn't like. Will Rogers
All I know is just what I read in the...
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All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance. Will Rogers
Do the best you can, and don't take life too...
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Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious. Will Rogers
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I...
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If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. Will Rogers
You know, everybody's ignorant, just on different subjects.
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You know, everybody's ignorant, just on different subjects. Will Rogers
The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking...
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The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. Will Rogers
If you want to be successful, it's just this simple....
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If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing. Will Rogers
Even if you are on the right track, but just...
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Even if you are on the right track, but just sit there, you will still get run over. Will Rogers
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
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Never miss a good chance to shut up. Will Rogers
Always drink upstream from the herd.
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Always drink upstream from the herd. Will Rogers
You can't say civilization dont advance, in every war they...
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You can't say civilization dont advance, in every war they kill you in a new way Will Rogers
The more you read and observe about this Politics thing,...
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The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best Will Rogers
The short memories of the American voters is what keeps...
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The short memories of the American voters is what keeps our politicians in office. Will Rogers
If pro is the opposite of con, what is the...
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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of Congress? Will Rogers
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they...
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The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected. Will Rogers
There are men running governments who shouldn't be allowed to...
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There are men running governments who shouldn't be allowed to play with matches. Will Rogers
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The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket. Will Rogers
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There are three kinds of men. The ones that learn by readin’. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves. Will Rogers
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Everybody is ignorant, Just on different subjects. Will Rogers
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An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out. Will Rogers
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Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than the government we got for one-third the money twenty years ago. Will Rogers
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The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. Will Rogers
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If stupidity got us in this mess, how come it can't get us out. Will Rogers
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If stupidity got us into this, why can't stupidity get us out? Will Rogers
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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. Will Rogers
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Even if you're on the right track you'll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers
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A holding company is the people you give your money to while you're being searched. Will Rogers
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Don't gamble take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up then sell it. If it don't go up don't buy it. Will Rogers
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The schools ain't what they used to be and never was. Will Rogers
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There is nothing so stupid as an educated man if you get off the thing that he was educated in. Will Rogers
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Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. Will Rogers
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There ain't nothing but one thing wrong with every one of us and that's selfishness. Will Rogers
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Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on earth. Will Rogers
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This thing of being a hero about the main thing to it is to know when to die. Will Rogers
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Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggie" until you can find a rock. Will Rogers
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We are all here for a spell get all the good laughs you can. Will Rogers
40
Everybody is ignorant only on different subjects. Will Rogers
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I don't know what humor is. Will Rogers
42
It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble it's what we know that ain't so. Will Rogers
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The only thing that can stop hair from falling ... is the floor. Will Rogers
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To make money buy some good stock hold it until it goes up and then sell it. If it doesn't go up don't buy it. Will Rogers
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AH I know is what I see in the papers. Will Rogers
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So get a few laughs and do the best you can. Will Rogers
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A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries. Will Rogers
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I'm not a member of any organized party I'm a Democrat. Will Rogers
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More men have been elected between Sundown and Sunup than ever were elected between Sunup and Sundown. Will Rogers
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If you ever injected truth into politics you would have no politics. Will Rogers
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The more you read about politics the more you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. Will Rogers
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Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with. Will Rogers
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The Republicans have their splits right after election and Democrats have theirs just before an election. Will Rogers
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One revolution is like one cocktail it just gets you organized for the next. Will Rogers
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We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by. Will Rogers
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We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by. Will Rogers
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The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr. Will Rogers
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Everyone is ignorant only on different subjects. Will Rogers
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When you put down the good things you ought to have done and leave out the bad things you did do - well that's memoirs. Will Rogers
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Rumor travels faster, but it don't stay put as long as truth. Will Rogers
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It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts. Will Rogers
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An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's. Will Rogers
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We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business? Will Rogers
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If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable. Will Rogers
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Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else. Will Rogers
66
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week. Will Rogers
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You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new way. Will Rogers
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Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week. Will Rogers
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I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one. Will Rogers
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I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies. Will Rogers
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The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. Will Rogers
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We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others. Will Rogers
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The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?' Will Rogers
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There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail. Will Rogers
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A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people. Will Rogers
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Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on Earth. Will Rogers
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Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth. Will Rogers
78
Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have. Will Rogers
79
The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you. Will Rogers
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Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. Will Rogers
81
Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it. Will Rogers
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If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics. Will Rogers
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A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth. Will Rogers
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The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself. Will Rogers
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I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago. Will Rogers
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There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education. Will Rogers
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I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. Will Rogers
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If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress. Will Rogers
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I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do. Will Rogers
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Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need. Will Rogers
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Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock. Will Rogers
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I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. Will Rogers
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A fool and his money are soon elected. Will Rogers
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Politics is applesauce. Will Rogers
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The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other. Will Rogers
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Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. Will Rogers
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Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate? Will Rogers
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Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven't had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln. Will Rogers
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If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. Will Rogers
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Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it. Will Rogers