1
A decorator can make lots of money - assuming she wins the lottery.Wendy Morgan
2
He's always been known to be entrepenurious.Wendy Morgan
3
Let us eat and drink: for tomorrow we diet.Wendy Morgan
4
I'm not much of a drinker. It only takes me one drink to get drunk .. . my fourth.Wendy Morgan
5
My husband lost a lot of weight on a new diet and I resent it. It's simple he just doesn't eat when I'm talking.Wendy Morgan
6
They say the Japanese don't experience menopause or hot flashes. If that's the case why are they the number-one fan-producing country in the world?Wendy Morgan
7
I don't give my weight. I weigh a hundred and plenty.Wendy Morgan
8
When she told her doctor that she always wanted to keep her weight exactly the same as her IQ he gave her a lecture on anorexia.Wendy Morgan
9
My husband yells comments like "How long till you're ready? Throw out a date."Wendy Morgan
10
My sister started to smell trouble when on the second day of her honeymoon the groom started asking for separate checks.Wendy Morgan
11
He says he's not broke but he is trying to sell his kidney and corneas.Wendy Morgan
12
If any of you are related to our main guest let me know so I can speak slowly.Wendy Morgan
13
I don't want to be patronizing. .. that means "talking down."Wendy Morgan
14
I was chosen to speak today based on my senility.Wendy Morgan
15
A lot of you want me to hurry through the introduction. That's because you're so much older you don't want to waste a minute of your life.Wendy Morgan
16
He is so aware of being politically correct he refers to a taco as Hispanic food.Wendy Morgan
17
If there's a God why are there such things as famine and The Jerry Springer Show.Wendy Morgan
18
As a woman I resent the fact that in golf if I have the highest score I'm the loser.Wendy Morgan
19
I get confused with all the rules in golf. Let's say you're playing in L.A. and your ball lands on a dead body. Is your relief one or two club lengths?Wendy Morgan
20
My golf is getting better all the time. Today I parred all but sixteen holes.Wendy Morgan
21
I'd like to thank the committee that brought this event about. It was an equal endeavor. They did the food decorations and reservations and I did the traffic flow.Wendy Morgan
22
I don't believe in astrology - of course that's very typical of Leos.Wendy Morgan