84 Quotes & Sayings By Sheryl Sandberg

Sheryl Sandberg is the chief operating officer of Facebook. She has been named one of the Most Powerful Women in the World by Forbes magazine and one of Time magazine's 100 Most Influential People. In addition to her role at Facebook, she is a vice chair of the board at Google, a member of the Economic Club of Silicon Valley, a board member of New York University's Center for Information Networking and a member of the President's Council on Jobs and Competitiveness.

What would you do if you weren't afraid?
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What would you do if you weren't afraid? Sheryl Sandberg
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Done is better than perfect. Sheryl Sandberg
We cannot change what we are not aware of, and...
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We cannot change what we are not aware of, and once we are aware, we cannot help but change. Sheryl Sandberg
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In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders. Sheryl Sandberg
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I hope you find true meaning, contentment, and passion in your life. I hope you navigate the difficult times and come out with greater strength and resolve. I hope you find whatever balance you seek with your eyes wide open. And I hope that you - yes, you - have the ambition to lean in to your career and run the world. Because the world needs you to change it. Sheryl Sandberg
Motivation comes from working on things we care about. It...
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Motivation comes from working on things we care about. It also comes from working with people we care about. Sheryl Sandberg
Women need to shift from thinking
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Women need to shift from thinking "I'm not ready to do that" to thinking "I want to do that- and I'll learn by doing it. Sheryl Sandberg
Why to women have to decide between family and career...
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Why to women have to decide between family and career if men don't even think about it? Sheryl Sandberg
If we push hard now, this next wave can be...
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If we push hard now, this next wave can be the last wave. In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders Sheryl Sandberg
Show me a woman without guilt and I'll show you...
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Show me a woman without guilt and I'll show you a man Sheryl Sandberg
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Feeling threatened by others' choices pulls us all down. Instead, we should funnel our energy into breaking this cycle. Sheryl Sandberg
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Women can enter (...) negotiations with the knowledge that showing concern for the common good, even as they negotiate for themselves, will strengthen their position. Sheryl Sandberg
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When looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier. . Sheryl Sandberg
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Taking risks, choosing growth, challenging ourselves, and asking for promotions (with smiles on our faces, of course) are all important elements of managing a career. One of my favorite quotes comes from author Alice Walker, who observed, "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." Do not wait for power to be offered. Like that tiara, it might never materialize. And anyway, who wears a tiara on a jungle gym?. Sheryl Sandberg
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I'm sorry if this sounds harsh or surprises anyone, but this is where we are. If you want the outcome to be different, you will have to do something about it. Sheryl Sandberg
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I realized that searching for a mentor has become the professional equivalent of waiting for Prince Charming. We all grew up on the fairy tale "Sleeping Beauty, " which instructs young women that if they just wait for their prince to arrive, they will be kissed and whisked away on a white horse to live happily ever after. Now young women are told that if they can just find the right mentor, they will be pushed up the ladder and whisked away to the corner office to live happily ever after. Once again, we are teaching women to be too dependent on others. . Sheryl Sandberg
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It takes a near act of rebellion for even a four-year-old to break away from society's expectations. Sheryl Sandberg
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But while compliant, raise-your-hand-and-speak-when-called-on behaviors might be rewarded in school, they are less valued in the workplace. Sheryl Sandberg
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Feedback is an opinion, grounded in observations and experiences, which allows us to know what impression we make on others. Sheryl Sandberg
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[F]eminism wasn't supposed to make us feel guilty, or prod us into constant competition over who is raising children better, organizing more cooperative marriages, or getting less sleep. It was supposed to make us free -to give us not only choices but the ability to make these choices without constantly feeling that we'd somehow gotten it wrong. Sheryl Sandberg
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You have to take opportunities and make an opportunity fit for you, rather than the other way around. Sheryl Sandberg
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A truly equal world would be one where women ran half our countries and companies and men ran half our homes. I believe that this would be a better world. Sheryl Sandberg
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We need to stop telling [women], "Get a mentor and you will excel." Instead, we need to tell them, "Excel and you will get a mentor. Sheryl Sandberg
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Looking back, it made no sense for my college friends and me to distance ourselves from the hard-won achievements of earlier feminists. We should have cheered their efforts. Instead, we lowered our voices, thinking the battle was over, and with this reticence we hurt ourselves. Sheryl Sandberg
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[Eric Schmidt] explained that only one criterion that mattered when picking a job- fat growth. When companies grow quickly, there are more things to do than there are people to do them. When companies grow more slowly or stop growing, there is less to do and too many people to not be doing them. Politics and stagnation set in, and everyone falters, He told me, "If you're offered a seat on a rocket sip, you don't ask what seat. You just get on. Sheryl Sandberg
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She explained that many people, but especially women, feel fraudulent when they are praised for their accomplishments. Instead of feeling worthy of recognition, they feel undeserving and guilty, as if a mistake has been made. Despite being high achievers, even experts in their fields, women can't seem to shake the sense that it is only a matter of time until they are found out for who they really are- impostors with limited skills or abilities. Sheryl Sandberg
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As women must be more empowered at work, men must be more empowered at home. I have seen so many women inadvertently discourage their husbands from doing their share by being too controlling or critical. Social scientists call this "maternal gatekeeping" which is a fancy term for "Ohmigod, that's not the way you do it! Just move aside and let me! ".. Anyone who wants her mate to be a true partner must treat him as an equal--and equally capable partner. And if that's note reason enough, bear in mind that a study found that wives who engage in gatekeeping behaviors do five more hours of family work per week than wives who take a more collaborative approach. Another common and counterproductive dynamic occurs when women assign or suggest taks to their partners. She is delegating, and that's a step in the right direction. But sharing responsibility should mean sharing responsibility. Each partner needs to be in charge of specific activities or it becomes too easy for one to feel like he's doing a favor instead of doing his part. Sheryl Sandberg
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Our culture needs to find a robust image of female success that is first, not male, and second, not a white woman on the phone, holding a crying baby, Sheryl Sandberg
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As an associate at McKinsey & Company, my first assignment was on a team that consisted of a male senior engagement manager (SEM) and two other male associates, Abe Wu and Derek Holley. When the SEM wanted to talk to Abe or Derek, he would walk over to their desks. When he wanted to talk to me, he would sit at his desk and shout, "Sandberg, get over here! " with the tone one might use to call a child or, even worse, a dog. It made me cringe every time. I never said anything, but one day Abe and Derek started calling each other "Sandberg" in that same loud voice. The self-absorbed SEM never seemed to notice. They kept it up. When having too many Sandbergs got confusing, they decided we needed to differentiate. Abe started calling himself "Asian Sandberg, " Derek dubbed himself "good-looking Sandberg, " and I became "Sandberg Sandberg." My colleagues turned an awful situation into one where I felt protected. They stood up for me and made me laugh. They were the best mentors I could have had. Sheryl Sandberg
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Each one of us is more than the worst thing we've ever done. Sheryl Sandberg
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We need more men to sit at the table... at the kitchen table. Sheryl Sandberg
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As more women lean in to their careers, more men need to lean in to their families. We need to encourage men to be more ambitious in their homes. Sheryl Sandberg
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Fortune does favor the bold and you'll never know what you're capable of if you don't try. Sheryl Sandberg
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At best, people are open to scrutinizing themselves and considering their blind spots; at worst, they become defensive and angry. Sheryl Sandberg
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By focusing on her career and taking a calculated approach to amassing power, Heidi violated our stereotypical expectations of women. Yet by behaving in the same manner, Howard lived up to our stereotypical expectations of men. The end result? Liked him, disliked her. Sheryl Sandberg
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Communication works best when we combine appropriateness with authenticity, finding that sweet spot where opinions are not brutally honest but delicately honest. Sheryl Sandberg
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When woman work outside the home and share breadwinning duties, couples are more likely to stay together. In fact, the risk of divorce reduces by about half when a wife earns half the income and a husband does half the housework. Sheryl Sandberg
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If I had to embrace a definition of success, it would be that success is making the best choices we can .. . and accepting them. Sheryl Sandberg
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To really care about others, we have to understand them - what they like and dislike, what they feel as well as think. Emotion drives both men and women and influences every decision we make. Recognizing the role emotions play and being willing to discuss them makes us better managers, partners, and peers. Sheryl Sandberg
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We need more portrayals of women as competent professionals and happy mothers - or even happy professionals and competent mothers. Sheryl Sandberg
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There is no perfect fit when you're looking for the next big thing to do. You have to take opportunities and make an opportunity fit for you, rather than the other way around. Sheryl Sandberg
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But I also know that in order to continue to grow and challenge myself, I have to believe in my own abilities. I still face situations that I fear are beyond my capabilities. I still have days when I feel like a fraud. And I still sometimes find myself spoken over and discounted while men sitting next to me are not. But now I know how to take a deep breath and keep my hand up. I have learned to sit at the table. Sheryl Sandberg
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Think personally, act communally. Sheryl Sandberg
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He said that when you want to change things, you can't please everyone. If you do please everyone, you aren't making enough progress. Mark was right. Sheryl Sandberg
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As a child I never thought about what I wanted to be, but I thought a lot about what I wanted to do. Sheryl Sandberg
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Every job will demand some sacrifice. The key is to avoid unnecessary sacrifice. Sheryl Sandberg
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I have written this book to encourage women to dream big, forge a path through the obstacles, and achieve their full potential. I am hoping that each woman will set her own goals and reach for them with gusto. And I am hoping that each man will do his part to support women in the workplace and in the home, also with gusto. As we start using the talents of the entire population, our institutions will be more productive, our homes will be happier, and the children growing up in those homes will no longer be held back by narrow stereotypes. . Sheryl Sandberg
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Just being nice is not a winning strategy. Nice sends a message that the woman is willing to sacrifice pay to be liked by others. This is why a woman needs to combine niceness with insistence, a style that Mary sue Coleman, president of the University of Michigan, calls "relentlessly pleasant." This method requires smiling frequently, expressing appreciation and concern, invoking common interests, emphasizing larger goals, and approaching the negotiation as solving a problem as opposed to taking a critical stance. Most negotiations involve drawn-out, successive moves, so women need to stay focused.. and smile. No wonder women don't negotiate as much as men. It's like trying to cross a minefield backward in high heels. So what should we do? Should we play by the rules that others created? Should we figure out a way to put on a friendly expression while not being too nice, displaying the right levels of loyalty and using "we" language? I understand the paradox of advising women to change the world by adhering to biased rules and expectations. I know it is not a perfect answer but a means to a desirable end. It is also true, as any good negotiator knows, that having a better understanding of the other side leads to a superior outcome. So at the very least, women can enter these negotiations with the knowledge that showing concern for the common good, even as they negotiate for themselves, will strengthen their position. Sheryl Sandberg
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You are the promise for a more equal world. So my hope for everyone here is that after you walk across this stage, after you get your diploma, after you go out tonight and celebrate hard - you then will lean way in to your career. You will find something you love doing and you will do it with gusto. Find the right career for you and go all the way to the top. As you walk off this stage today, you start your adult life. Start out by aiming high. Try - and try hard. Like everyone here, I have great hopes for the members of this graduating class. I hope you find true meaning, contentment, and passion in your life. I hope you navigate the difficult times and come out with greater strength and resolve. I hope you find whatever balance you seek with your eyes wide open. And I hope that you - yes, you - have the ambition to lean in to your career and run the world. Because the world needs you to change it. Women all around the world are counting on you. So please ask yourself: What would I do if I weren't afraid? And then go do it. Sheryl Sandberg
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I know that my success comes from hard work, help from others, and being at the right place at the right time. I feel a deep and enduring sense of gratitude to those who have given me opportunities and support. I recognize the sheer luck of being born into my family in the United States rather than one of the many places in the world where women are denied basic rights. I believe that all of us - men and women alike - should acknowledge good fortune and thank the people who have helped us. No one accomplishes anything all alone. But I also know that in order to continue to grow and challenge myself, I have to believe in my own abilities. I still face situations that I fear are beyond my capabilities. I still have days when I feel like a fraud. And I still sometimes find myself spoken over and discounted while men sitting next to me are not. But now I know how to take a deep breath and keep my hand up. I have learned to sit at the table. Sheryl Sandberg
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Many have argued with me that ambition is not the problem. Women are not less ambitious than men, they insist, but more enlightened with different and more meaningful goals. I do not dismiss or dispute this argument. There is far more to life than climbing a career ladder, including raising children, seeking personal fulfillment, contributing to society, and improving the lives of others. And there are many people who are deeply committed to their jobs but do not - and should not have to - aspire to run their organizations. Leadership roles are not the only way to have profound impact. Sheryl Sandberg
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In addition to the external barriers erected by society, women are hindered by barriers that exist within ourselves. We hold ourselves back in ways both big and small, by lacking self-confidence, by not raising our hands, and by pulling back when we should be leaning in. We internalize the negative messages we get throughout our lives - the messages that say it's wrong to be outspoken, aggressive, more powerful than men. We lower our own expectations of what we can achieve. We continue to do the majority of the housework and child care. We compromise our career goals to make room for partners and children who may not even exist yet. Compared to our male colleagues, fewer of us aspire to senior positions. This is not a list of things other women have done. I have made every mistake on this list. At times, I still do. My argument is that getting rid of these internal barriers is critical to gaining power. Others have argued that women can get to the top only when the institutional barriers are gone. This is the ultimate chicken-and-egg situation. The chicken: Women will tear down the external barriers once we achieve leadership roles. We will march into our bosses' offices and demand what we need, including pregnancy parking. Or better yet, we'll become bosses and make sure all women have what they need. The egg: We need to eliminate the external barriers to get women into those roles in the first place. Both sides are right. So rather than engage in philosophical arguments over which comes first, let's agree to wage battles on both fronts. They are equally important. I am encouraging women to address the chicken, but I fully support those who are focusing on the egg. Internal obstacles are rarely discussed and often underplayed. Throughout my life, I was told over and over about inequalities in the workplace and how hard it would be to have a career and a family. I rarely heard anything, however, about the ways I might hold myself back. These internal obstacles deserve a lot more attention, in part because they are under our own control. We can dismantle the hurdles in ourselves today. We can start this very moment. Sheryl Sandberg
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If we want a world with greater equality, we need to acknowledge that women are less likely to keep their hands up. We need institutions and individuals to notice and correct for this behavior by encouraging, promoting, and championing more women. And women have to learn to keep their hands up, because when they lower them, even managers with the best intentions might not notice. Sheryl Sandberg
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In November 2011, San Francisco magazine ran a story on female entrepreneurs in Silicon Valley and illustrated it by superimposing the featured women's heads onto male bodies. The only body type they could imagine for successful entrepreneurship was wearing a tie or a hoodie. Our culture needs to find a robust image of female success that is first, not male, and second, not a white woman on the phone, holding a crying baby. Sheryl Sandberg
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No wonder women don't negotiate as often as men. It's like trying to cross a minefield backward in high heels. Sheryl Sandberg
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Whoever has the power takes the noun while the less powerful get an adjective. No one wants her achievements modified. We all just want to be the noun. Sheryl Sandberg
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Presenting leadership as a list of carefully defined qualities (like strategic, analytical, and performance-oriented) no longer holds. Instead, true leadership stems from individuality that is honestly and sometimes imperfectly expressed.... Leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection. Sheryl Sandberg
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We must raise both the ceiling and the floor. Sheryl Sandberg
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A feminist is someone who believes in social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. Sheryl Sandberg
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At a small dinner with other business executives, the guest of honor spoke the entire time without taking a breath. This meant that the only way to ask a question or make an observation was to interrupt. Three or four men jumped in, and the guest politely answered their questions before resuming his lecture. At one point, I tried to add something to the conversation and he barked, "Let me finish! You people are not good at listening! " Eventually, a few more men interjected and he allowed it. Then the only other female executive at the dinner decided to speak up--and he did it again! He chastised her for interrupting. After the meal, one of the male CEOs pulled me aside to say that he had noticed that only the women had been silenced. He told me he empathized, because as a Hispanic, he has been treated like this many times. . Sheryl Sandberg
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When my mother took her turn to sit in a gown at her graduation, she thought she only had two career options: nursing and teaching. She raised me and my sister to believe that we could do anything, and we believed her. Sheryl Sandberg
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We can each define ambition and progress for ourselves. The goal is to work toward a world where expectations are not set by the stereotypes that hold us back, but by our personal passion, talents and interests. Sheryl Sandberg
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I'm not pretending I can give advice to every single person or every single couple for every situation I'm making the point that we are not going to get to equality in the workforce before we get to equality in the home. Not going to happen. Sheryl Sandberg
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Women have made tons of progress. But we still have a small percentage of the top jobs in any industry, in any nation in the world. I think that's partly because from a very young age, we encourage our boys to lead and we call our girls bossy. Sheryl Sandberg
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It is the ultimate luxury to combine passion and contribution. It's also a very clear path to happiness. Sheryl Sandberg
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I don't believe we have a professional self Monday through Friday and a real self the rest of the time. It is all professional, and it is all personal. Sheryl Sandberg
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I wish I could just go tell all the young women I work with, all these fabulous women, 'Believe in yourself and negotiate for yourself. Own your own success.' I wish I could tell that to my daughter. But it's not that simple. Sheryl Sandberg
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I'm not telling women to be like men. I'm telling us to evaluate what men and women do in the workforce and at home without the gender bias. Sheryl Sandberg
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Women don't take enough risks. Men are just 'foot on the gas pedal.' We're not going to close the achievement gap until we close the ambition gap. Sheryl Sandberg
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The No. 1 impediment to women succeeding in the workforce is now in the home. Sheryl Sandberg
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I'm a pragmatist. I think, as a woman, you have to be more careful. You have to be more communal, you have to say yes to more things than men, you have to worry about things that men don't have to worry about. But once we get enough women into leadership, we can break stereotypes down. If you lead, you get to decide. Sheryl Sandberg
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If more women are in leadership roles, we'll stop assuming they shouldn't be. Sheryl Sandberg
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I don't pretend there aren't biological differences, but I don't believe the desire for leadership is hardwired biology, not the desire to win or excel. I believe that it's socialization, that we're socializing our daughters to nurture and our boys to lead. Sheryl Sandberg
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Our discomfort with female leadership runs deep. We call little girls bossy. We never really call little boys bossy, because a boy is expected to lead, so it doesn't surprise or offend. Sheryl Sandberg
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I'd like to see where boys and girls end up if they get equal encouragement - I think we might have some differences in how leadership is done. Sheryl Sandberg
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Writing about joyful experiences for just three days can improve people's moods and decrease their visits to health centers a full three months later. Sheryl Sandberg
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When I went to college, as much as my parents emphasized academic achievement, they emphasized marriage even more. They told me that the most eligible women marry young to get a 'good man' before they are all taken. Sheryl Sandberg
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I would love to meet J.K. Rowling and tell her how much I admire her writing and am amazed by her imagination. I read every 'Harry Potter' book as it came out and looked forward to each new one. I am rereading them now with my kids and enjoying them every bit as much. She made me look at jelly beans in a whole new way. Sheryl Sandberg
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My grandfather had a paint store. It's what put my mom through college. Small business is part of my family history. Sheryl Sandberg
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It turns out that a husband who does the laundry, it's very romantic when you're older. And it's hard to believe when you're younger. But it's absolutely true. Sheryl Sandberg
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It's more pressure on women to - if they marry or partner with someone, to partner with the right person. Because you cannot have a full career and a full life at home with your children if you are also doing all of the housework and child care. Sheryl Sandberg
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I have a five year-old son and a three year-old daughter. I want my son to have a choice to contribute fully in the workforce or at home. And I want my daughter to have the choice to not just succeed, but to be liked for her accomplishments. Sheryl Sandberg
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'Option B' draws not just on my story but on the research and stories of many people overcoming all kinds of adversity. No one should have to go through challenges and trauma alone. Sheryl Sandberg