15 Quotes & Sayings By Elayne Boosler

Elayne Boosler grew up in a tiny village in the mountains of western North Carolina. Her family was a close-knit one, and her mother taught her to read at a very early age. After high school, she attended college and received a degree in sociology. She went on to receive a master's degree in counseling from Wake Forest University Read more

In 1987, Elayne became a licensed minister. Her work as an ordained minister has taken her to various parts of the United States to speak to women's groups, Bible study groups, and other organizations. Her work has appeared in numerous national publications including Essence, Ms., and O, The Oprah Magazine.

Elayne is the author of four books: The Spiritual Warrior's Handbook: Finding Winning Blocks for a Winning Life; The Spiritual Warrior's Workbook: A Guide for Spiritually Defined Personal Growth; The Spiritual Warrior's Way to Clarity: Practical Steps for Getting Clarity About Your Life; and The Spiritual Warrior's Guide to Fulfilling Your Dreams: Creating a Life of Success and Abundance . She has also written numerous articles for newspapers and magazines.

1
I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body. Elayne Boosler
2
The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born. Elayne Boosler
3
For a single woman preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton. Elayne Boosler
4
My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times men would not stop to ask directions. Elayne Boosler
5
I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car, your boat, your safety deposit box, your bike lock or your private community. It's the key to order, sanity, and peace of mind. The key is 'Delete.' Elayne Boosler
6
Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix? Elayne Boosler
7
When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking. Elayne Boosler
8
I am thankful that geniuses and artists and good people, no matter how hard it is, will eventually be recognized. I am doubly thankful that also goes for idiots. Elayne Boosler
9
I am thankful I was born in America, although if I gain any more weight the burqa thing may start to seem like a good idea to me. See? Another plus about America, you can always find some food. Elayne Boosler
10
I am thankful that all the people in the world who absolutely, positively, know what God wants, usually kill mostly each other. Elayne Boosler
11
I've thought for the last decade or so, the only actual place raw truth was seeping through in newspapers was on the Comics Pages. They were able to pull off intelligent social comment, pure truths not found elsewhere in the news pages, and had the ability to make it all funny, entertaining, and pertinent. Elayne Boosler
12
I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. Elayne Boosler
13
I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. Elayne Boosler
14
I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to someone who will leave them alone. Elayne Boosler